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Doctor I am pregnant for my elder sister's husband

Ruth Deji
3 Oct 2021 2:45 PM IST
Doctor I am pregnant for my elder sisters husband
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Dr Adesida Adewumi (Area of specialization: Family medicine)

This story you are about to read started many years ago between two sisters but the truth only came out 3 weeks ago when Mercy opened up to me and also gave me the permission to write her story so that you can advise her on what to do and also learns from her mistakes. Below is the story.

Three weeks ago I heard a knock on the door of my consulting room. Somehow many years of my practice have taught me to come to understand the moods of my different patients based on the way they knock on my consulting room door. Those in emergency knock hard and several times. Those who are depressed knock weakly and only once or twice. This knock was just once and very weak, I know it was that of a patient in despair and despondency. " I said yes "come in". She opened the door and came in. My guess was right. Standing before me was a young woman in her late 20's looking dejected and rejected.

"You are welcome. What can I do for you?" I asked. She managed to answer me "Doctor I am tired of life". That response hit me and made me readjust my seat. I knew I had a serious life matter in my hands." I called my file attendant who was opening her card to bring it quickly which he did. I asked her to have her seat and asked for her name. She answered MERCY ( NOT THE REAL NAME). "So what is the problem? Why are you tired of life? Hope you don't have any plan killing yourself?" I asked. She said "Doctor if death could just come for me right now, will I not be better off? ". I answered her "The most important thing in life is life itself. As far as you are alive, there is hope no matter the situation" I counselled her, not knowing that I was about to hear the worst secret of my entire career so far. In fact we got to a point when she was telling me her story, I almost agreed with her within me that truly death might actually be better but thank God whose mercy is infinite and limitless, no matter the depth of our decadence.

Are you ready to read MERCY'S true life story? Then take your seat, let's go.

"So MERCY I am all ears. Tell me everything that happened to you that made you think death is better". She breathed in deeply and tears started rolling down her cheeks as she asked me the scary question : "DOCTOR I AM PREGNANT FOR MY ELDER SISTER'S HUSBAND: DO I ABORT THE PREGNANCY OR DO I MARRY HIM?" I didn't know when I breathed deeply in too and said " your elder sister's husband?" "The same father the same mother? " She said yes. I breathed deeply in again and composed myself like a professional. "Okay MERCY how did you get here? How did you get pregnant for your elder sister's husband? Is your sister aware? Tell me more about this whole thing". Little did I even know that I had not heard the deepest and worst secret. She went ahead to ask me the second question without responding to any of my serial questions. "DOCTOR DO YOU KNOW THIS IS SECOND PREGNANCY? I HAD A CHILD FOR HIM ALREADY WHO IS LIVING WITH US BUT MY SISTER DID NOT KNOW THAT HER HUSBAND IS THE FATHER". At this junction I didn't know if I dropped my pen on the floor or my pen dropped from my hands to the floor, I had to manage to bend down, pick it up and sit down very well again so that I wouldn't lose my balance on the seat.

"Mercy are you serious about what you just told me?" I asked unbelievably. She said yes doctor. I said how? Okay can you tell me your whole story with your sister and how you got to this level? Then the sad story began " Doctor I will blame our parents for all this" " why" I asked. She continued "When we were growing up doctor our parents had always preferred my elder sister to me. They would always say she is more responsible than me. They would always say I am useless I should go and look at my elder sister how she is living her life and emulate her. I became competitive with my sister as early as I could remember in life as children. Anything she had I wanted it. I competed with her in everything in life. This cut across even her boyfriends when we grew up. Doctor I dated two of her boyfriends when we were staying together as sisters in the university but she didn't know. I even aborted for one of them." I was trying not to sweat and keep my calm and composure. We doctors hear deep things of life behind those closed doors of our consulting rooms. We carry them with us as burdens everyday even to our graves. Only those secrets we are permitted by the owners to share can be revealed. Sometimes we get depressed hearing these stories. Sometimes my wife would notice I looked depressed she would ask me what the problem is I will say nothing, yet there are millions of secrets you can't share because you swore to an oath to die with them. May God help all doctors world over. Please keep praying for us for strength.

Back to our story. MERCY continued " doctor I have even broken up some of my sister's relationships in the past that she was not aware that I was the one that broke them. She was not a saint after all like our late parents painted her. There was a time she was planning to marry one responsible, rich, successful guy that loved her so much but I noticed she and one of her exes were still talking. I went ahead to tell the other guy that was planning to marry her which led to their break up. She almost died from the incidence and till today she never knew it was me that told the guy. Doctor I am an horrible person right?" She asked me as guilt was written all over her and was crying bitterly. I consoled her and urged her to continue her story because truly I didn't want to answer that question.

She continued" Doctor so to how I got here with my sister's husband...5 years ago she got married and you know we have been staying together since we lost our parents. We were the only two our parents had. So when she got married I followed her to her husband's house to be staying with her. After two years into the marriage that she could not conceive I started giving her husband signal that I was available if he wanted me. Doctor I never knew the extent this childhood rivalry had eaten me up until now. Doctor my sister's husband and myself started having intimacy right under her nose and on her matrimonial bed. Anytime she travelled and left me at home with her husband, I took care of her husband till she returned. Eventually I got pregnant for the husband. I wanted to ABORT it but he begged me and begged me that I shouldn't. He would find a fake father for the child who would take responsibility for the pregnancy and the child without my sister knowing. The whole issue of being pregnant became fight between me and my sister but the fake man showed up and claimed responsibility for it and begged my sister to please calm down he would marry me but not now because he was still job hunting which made my sister to leave me in her house to continue staying with her with my child but she could not help the way her husband loved the child so much. She noticed it."

"Doctor I regretted all this. I felt my betrayal of my sister had gone too far. I cried and repented after the whole incident but I was scared to death to confess to my sister what I had done to her but I vowed nothing would happen between me and her husband again. I kept to this promise doctor until 2 months ago. All this while my guilt gave me strength to fight off the husband anytime my sister was not at home and the husband wanted to play with me. I thought I had even overcome him until 2 months ago when one thing led to another and it happened again. Doctor I never saw my period again which made me to do pregnancy test yesterday lo and behold POSITIVE. Doctor help me how do I go about my life from here? To now make matter worse doctor do you know that till now my sister has still not gotten pregnant for the husband? And I told the man yesterday about the second pregnancy and he told me I should marry her, he would divorce my sister and marry me. Doctor please help me I am finished"

I was looking at Mercy like a lucozade for almost 5 minutes after hearing her story because I didn't even know the way forward. Till now I don't know the way forward which made me to ask for her permission to throw it open to the whole world for advice and suggestions. Please the matter is now in your court what do you think is the solution to this problem?

As for Mercy's questions to me if she should ABORT the pregnancy or marry her sister's husband. My own answer is NO to the two questions. DON'T ABORT THE CHILD AND DONT MARRY ANOTHER WOMAN'S HUSBAND EVEN IF THE WOMAN INVOLVED IS NOT YOUR SISTER. As to where to go from here I will leave you readers to offer your pieces of advice and suggestions on this delicate matter. As for me I learnt some powerful life lessons from this matter which I will like to share with you before I leave the floor open for comments and suggestions. Below are the lessons:

LESSON NUMBER 1:

My first lesson goes to the parents. STOP comparing your children with each other. Stop telling one child to look at another one. Handle each child according to their uniqueness and correct them without comparing them to one another. You dont know the depth of sibling rivalry you are creating and how far into generations it can go.

LESSON NUMBER 2:

Your own blood sister or brother can betray you. What am I even saying? Can kill you and take over your life. Trust people but NEVER trust ANYBODY I repeat anybody BLINDLY. It is only God that is infallible.

LESSON NUMBER 3:

This lesson goes to all married women. Be careful the level of closeness you allow between your sister and your husband. The best of men are still men,they can crumble in the face of temptation. Put cautions and boundaries in place. Don't say she is my sister. He is my husband. Nothing can happen between them. It will shock you.

LESSON NUMBER 4:

This is to all the husbands. Do everything not to betray the confidence your wife has in you. She will never always be there to monitor you or what you do but let your oath before God and man the day you married her be your bond.

LESSON NUMBER 5

This is to my fellow doctors. Don't share in anybody's sin of murder to take an innocent life. No matter how bad the situation don't help anyone to commit any abortion. Allow them to face the consequences of their action. God is watching you and you will give account on the last day when you face God on the judgement day

NOTE: PLEASE ANY ADVICE OR SUGGESTION you HAVE FOR MERCY, WRITE IT IN THE COMMENT BELOW. I WILL DEFINITELY GET THEM ACROSS TO HER.

You can reach me through WHATSAPP: +2348068649694.

Ruth Deji

Ruth Deji

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